// EMPLOYEE ONBOARDING

YOU ARE A CURSOR.
THE FEED IS HUNGRY.

A horde-survival bullet-heaven about clicking your way out of corporate-tech hell.

PLAY OUR GAMES

In development. No launch date yet. Be the first to know when the shift starts.

Cursor employment is at-will and ends in HR Termination.

SCROLL ▼

// THE LOOP

GENREhorde-survival auto-combat roguelike

ROLEindividual contributor (you)

TENURE30:00 max, then offboarded

Survive the swarm, draw level-up cards, evolve your tooling. The Feed will not ship. You will not be promoted. This is by design.

HORDE-SURVIVAL · BULLET-HEAVEN · AUTO-BATTLER ROGUELIKE · DEATH BY EMAIL

// THE ROSTER

PICK YOUR ARCHETYPE.

The roster is the comedy. Seventeen cursors, each a different way to be online. Here are a few of them.

THE USER

Hasn't opted out of anything.Default settings. Default everything.

REGION: NA-EAST · UNINSTALLS: 0

THE LURKER

Compiled their own kernel just to avoid ads.Reads every thread. Posts in none.

KERNEL: 6.6.0 · POSTS: 14,402

THE DOOMSCROLLER

Eighteen hours of screen time. Says it feels like four.Refreshed the feed. Refreshed the feed. Refreshed the feed.

SCREEN TIME: 18.3 hrs · UNREAD: 9999+

THE COMPLIANCE OFFICER

Has read every Terms of Service. Yes, all of them.Filed the addendum to the addendum.

STATUTES READ: 14,022 · BANNERS DISMISSED: 0

THE GHOST

Read 7:42 PM. Replied never.Typing... Typing... Stopped typing.

LAST SEEN: 3h AGO · DRAFTS: 47

THE PROVOCATEUR

The post is bad. The numbers are good.Was correct. Got banned anyway.

REPLIES: 38K · RATIO: -981

THE ON-CALL

Pager went off at 3:14am. East-one again.Sev-1. Sev-1. Sev-1. Coffee.

REGION: EAST-ONE · COFFEE: 6

THE HUSTLER

Side hustle, main hustle, sleep hustle.Quitting their day job to monetize their morning routine.

CONNECTIONS: 4,288 · OPEN TO WORK

[ REDACTED ]
pending background check
+ 9 more on the roster

// PROOF WE SHIP

WE SHIP. SCRUMBAG IS NEXT.

While SCRUMBAG is in development, the rest of the studio is already out and playable. We finish what we start.

AD-BIRD-TISING

High-performance marketing, one flap at a time. Flap through the pipes — every billboard is a real ad slot someone rented. Playable right here.

also on itch.io ▸

AD_BIRD_TISING.EXE

// FACILITIES — RENT-A-PIPE

RENT-A-PIPE™

Rent a billboard inside AD-BIRD-TISING. Your message renders in-game, right in the path of destruction. 14-character limit.

$5 / 24HRS

No profanity. All sales final. Profane ads will be removed without refund. Stockout Studio assumes no liability for messages rendered in-world.

RENT-A-PIPE NOW ▸

FREE · IN BROWSER

GRIDWING DEMO

A fast action arcade game. Can you handle the 5th Sector? Free and playable right in your browser.

PLAY THE FREE DEMO ▸

FULL RELEASE

GRIDWING — FULL GAME

Enter the wing. The complete release, out now on itch.io.

GET THE FULL GAME ▸

And SCRUMBAG is what's next.

HR Termination <hr@scrumbag.corp>

To: you@scrumbag.corp · Subject: effective immediately

Per the 30:00 review cycle, your access has been revoked. We thank you for your contributions to The Feed, which will not ship.

Your cursor continued auto-firing for four seconds after termination. This is normal and within policy. A performance summary is attached for your records.

TIME SURVIVED	30:00
TICKETS CLOSED	1,204
WEAPON OF RECORD	POP-UP BLOCKER
SEVERANCE	+1,240 ATT
NEW RECORD?	NOT FOR US.

There is only one way to respond to this email.

YOU ARE A CURSOR.THE FEED IS HUNGRY.